January 2012
1 post
December 2011
8 posts
loganbogan:
I need help. Advice. From someone who doesn’t know the other person involved. In fact, if you don’t even know me, that’s even better. I just need someone.
I’m always here for you Logan :)
I really miss
my best friends. a lot.
November 2011
12 posts
Why being a girl isn't working out for me:
Body: Oh, guess what time of the month it is!
Me: Please, god, no--
Ovaries: ALL SYSTEMS GOOOOOOOO!!!
Brain: I quit. i quit. kittens and cupcakes and no one loves me. oh my god salty snacks i am furious
Me: Please, guys, calm down--
Face: TIME TO RUIN EVERYTHING YOU HAVE EVER LIKED ABOUT ME. I'M GROWING MOUNTAINS, BITCHES.
Brain: And now I'm ugly! shbdksdnksbn
Torso: Time to practice labor. cramp this bitch up. GO GO GO GO GO GO
Me: STOP IT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!
Stomach: lol clothes cant fit you anymore. you are bloated. you are now a balloooooooon!
Me: I hate you all
Brain: I KNOW EVERYONE HATES ME I AM SO DEPRESSED. we need to procreate.
Face: Lol, i'm not done yet.
Uterus: what did i ever do to deserve this?
Brain: you just wait uterus. they're going to make you hold a baby for like 9 months straight.
Uterus: You mother fuckers.
Torso: CONTRACT!
Me: I quit being female, I am now a llama.
Brain: Me gusta.
….But when a saga popular with pre-adolescent girls peaks romantically on a...
– Linda Holmes reviewing Breaking Dawn
misslestrange:
I have this really big test tomorrow
Is it Christmas break yet?
younghollywoodcelebs:
I’m so sick of school.
ughhhhh. for real.
October 2011
2 posts
1 tag
Someone called me for relationship advice at...
Friend: It's just... I don't get it, ya know? It's like--
Me: Does he make you happy on purpose?
Friend: What?
Me: Does he make you happy on purpose? Like, when you talk about how great he is you're telling me he's good looking and has a secure job. Does he go out of his way to intentionally make your life better? Does he enjoy your joy?
Friend: ...I don't know?
Me: There's your problem.
Friend: I don't think that's fair.
Me: Sorry, but the people who love you on this planet are the ones who want to see you live your best life. Who take time out of dealing with their own shit to clear away some of your shit. And vice versa. That is love. If he doesn't make you happy on purpose then it's just abs.
September 2011
6 posts
That one weird best friend you do weird things...
angiestrikesback:
truth.
Teacher : What comes after 69?
Student : Mouthwash
Teacher : Get out.
1 tag
August 2011
18 posts
1 tag
1 tag
That awkward moment when you're supposed to be...
thatfunnyblog:
http://thatfunnyblog.tumblr.com/
3 tags
3 tags
When your ex says they still want you
Of course you do, I’m fucking perfect.
Putting your iPod on shuffle...
jagsrox:
“Not this one.”
“Or this one.”
“Bingo.”
Everyday occurrence.
July 2011
46 posts
Your brown eyes are my blue skies.